Like the headline said: It's been a very creative and therapeutic process reminiscing over the past 9 years of bittersweet, dark and cranky "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" as the one-man comedy/variety/political wrecking-ball know as "Zuma Dogg." In case I wake up tomorrow and something good happens and I regret all the "ZD backstage gossip" (extra ebitter-cranky rants) as it all went down on Twitter, I am not going to re-post the content here as I usually do, but LINK to it for you to check out. Cause some of it SHOULD be comedy, mixed in with the tragedy.
But here's ONE thing I will rub in to the ZD loser-haters on the wrong side of the issues: I was walking down the boulevard of broken dreams (the sidewalk) and heard that really bad/out of key echo coming out of a bar that is instantly recognizable as "karaoke." So of course, ZD walks in. It doesn't matter how tired and burnt out I am, singing karaoke is always a good spiritually uplifiting, theraputic release if nothing else.
I sang my first Michael Jackson song, "Man In The Mirror" cause I want to try and give taxpayers as much bang for their taxpayers buck as possible for the Staples Memorial Event, so I tried to re-create some of it for the crowd.
After I shook so many hands, and my back got black and blue marks from so many people patting me on the back and some "squeezing" me (I guess that means they liked it), I walked toward the door and stood near back of bar. This loud, tough guy commented on my song and started talking to me, but he didn't recognize me as ZD, or anything. Just being social. So he puts out his hand and introduces himself and gives me his name, as you do at some point of a conversation. So I say, "Zuma" in return to him giving me his name. He busts out into excited "Zuma Dogg!?!?!" I say warmly, "Yeah!" He says, "THE Zuma Dogg?" (As if there is so much money to be made in being a ZD imperonator/imposter.) I only had on my hat/no glasses, so I put on glasses and say, "Yeah!"
LET ME TELL YOU MAYOR VILLARIGOSA, CITY COUNCIL AND ANYONE AND EVERYONE WHO'S ZUMA DOGG'S POPULARITY MAKES NERVOUS...
And I will start by saying, we all know, that I already KNOW how beloved I think I am...(tounge in cheek)...but NAW...NAW...NAW...HELL NAW!!!
I literally walked away and had tears streaming down my face and my nose started running a little...and my eyes are tearing up right now, and if you ask me in person they probably will again, when I think of how that loud, tough-guy described me to his friend who he called over.
He comes off like a New Yorker, but is not from NY, cause I asked him, "Are you from New York." So he calls over his friend and shouts, "This is Zuma Dogg! Do you know who he IS?"
His friend doesn't have TV and he didn't know me. SO THAT MEANS HIS FRIEND HAD TO TELL HIM AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALL about me.
LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING, PEOPLE. Even ZD may have under-estimated what is going on with ZD out there. The way this guy described me, and what I do, was something most people don't get to hear about themselves. WOW...seriously, I don't care WHAT you think about me posting this. When I lose my mind from sleep deprivation and hungry-homelessness there is no shame...and I've been saying I've been feeling gaining momentum with public, at same time I am fading harder than ever...and it's still gonna be rough in the morning as I am walking out of this karaoke bar with free wi-fi to find somewhere to sleep out on the streets...I WISH THE WHOLE WORLD COULD HAVE JUST HEARD HOW THIS GRUFF, LOUD RANDOM STRANGER THAT I NEVER EVEN THOUGHT WOULD BE PAYING ATTENTION DESCRIBED ZD...HE SURE AS HELL MUST BE PAYING A HELL OF A LOT OF ATTENTION. I HAVE NO IDEA HOW HE COULD EVEN HAVE BEEN ABLE TO DESCRIBE ME THAT WAY WITH SUCH DETAIL.
LIVE WITH IT LOSERS...Hope I do.