Sunday, October 4, 2009

I'm trying to get over it...

Q: What do you do if you have a nervous breakdown, but still have to keep going on the streets 24/7?. I think we found out over the past few months.

What we have here is a situation where Zuma Dogg has been running the show of Dave's life for nine years, now. And it's been one intense victory parade and it's true about the intense level of high acclaim from the masses and celebrities alike, throughout L.A. and Ventura Counties (this is all before the City Hall era). But now that Dave has pulled the plug on the party, the vibe and energy that sustained this maddening lifestyle on the street is gone...and Dave is left dealing with the wreckage. But people aren't stopping the ZD appreciation parade and as of an hour ago, when I walked into a store that was about to close and I said, "Oh, did I make it?" He said, "Never too late for Zuma Dogg." And that's still cool, even though I REALLY didn't want that reaction. And I have never actually felt that way before. I used to walk the city seeking it out. So, I guess I've crossed over into a true celebrity (although local) and can just try to get over it. But the problem is you do have to be "on" all the time, cause then he says to the other clerk, "Look who's here, Zuma Dogg." And so now I'm giving the handshakes and they're asking me for the latest. SO IT'S NO MAN'S LAND. Because I pulled the plug and show's over...but they don't know and Gilligan probably dealt with this till the day he died.

When an accountant is done with his job, he doesn't answer accounting questions every second to people as he goes about his day.

And then after that, when I was on the phone walking through Coffee Bean, someone gave the "Oh no, Zuma Dogg....I saw you in Malibu at the Wine Bar, that night. (The night I blew Kid Rock off the karaoke stage). So it's been a lot of intense energy and output: Either public access comedy, or city hall appearances or touring the karaoke bars across L.A., cause that's what spawned the ZD character anyway, and I've seen a thousand faces, and I've rocked them all. So it's always something. And I used to love it. But now that I am trying to move on, I really, really, really feel uncomfortable now with all the constant "on" recognition...but even worse, as I really think I'm too burnt to come back -- and seriously don't think squat is going to happen beyond this, and don't see myself able to do the things I need to do to save myself at this deep level of the rut -- the "fame" has caught up with me and in these overly stressful times for me on the streets, all I can do is re-live all the memories of the most intense wave of deep appreciation I think anyone has ever experienced in this way...and I never felt anything but "average" or "below average" in intelligence -- and never felt I was an entertainer, or a crowd pleaser, or singer or "artist." So to be so celebrated while contrasted with homelessness is a real mind f-er. I've really handled it well, believe it or not over the past nine years, but I really feel a cucumber has turned into a pickle on this one.


I'm trying to get over it, and unfortunately for some of you readers, the only way I can move on, in my mind, is to get it all out on this blog. I like having it down for the record. Man, last night was a full moon and I really felt like "Werewolves of London." Man, I never believed in full moon stuff until last night.

And a lot of this process has been "energy based" and from a quantum level and it takes a lot out of you and it's been a "bad" energy I have been taking on with all the shadiness, corruption and problems and city hall b.s. -- and certain parts of the city really affect me in a bad way, like Venice, which is where I was when all of this bad energy was going down. Too put it in "Ghostbusters" terms: I've been slimed!

I had to re-locate to Santa Monica/Palisades area tonight, no slam on the mayor, or anything... just need some chill peace and it comes down to "zoning."

I have to come to grips with something else, and a lot of you will like hearing this...there is tremendous amounts of non-material spiritual energy running rampant throughout the universe and a city like this. And a person like myself is VERY sensitive to it, and I think it's why I was a marketing research genius in radio and was able to reflect the tastes of the market the way no one else could, and the way research couldn't tell you until it was too late. It's the collective consciousness out there, and it's not really that big of a deal. I've been playing with THAT fire WAY too much -- and I just realized it. So if you can benefit at all by this weekend of posting, at least I hope you are more aware of the non-material spiritual energy that REALLY runs the world. If you can turn on a radio and pull in non-material intelligence (radio waves) why don't you think mother nature could have created the same thing as we did. After all, there's nothing we can make, that mother nature already hasn't. Maybe I'll go into more of that later. I've written about how to access and channel this energy, but most of you wouldn't want to do it, cause you can't watch too much sports and prime time TV and have to focus your mind and energy.

But sorry to rub in the effect the level of intense fan reaction has finally had on me. I'm trying to get over it. I think I'm making progress. But finally, the big mistake we all made was thinking Zuma was the a-hole and Dave was the nice guy. Opps, forgot to mention, other way around. Dave kinda suffers from "Jack Weiss Syndrome" and ZD has been dragging him around and he's been going along with it...but without ZD running the show...and Dave all alone...YIKES!

HERE ARE SOME LOST ZD AUDIO BITS INCLUDING PRE-CITY HALL ERA STUFF YOU MAY HAVE MISSED. Oh man, that Verizon commercial is one of my favorite productions ever. Just the thought of the concept and the way it was produced. Poor Bruce!
  1. Zuma Dogg Classic Commercial Parody: - "The Verizon" by Zuma Dogg & The E Street Band w /Bruce Springsteen (Parody) http://ow.ly/sGSm
  2. Zuma's #1 Song: "Big ZD From the 213 (As U Can See) Theme song from my show and international classic! (Like Gin & Juice) http://ow.ly/sGRA
  3. Official ZUMA DOGG Jingle Shout: (K-Earth 101 Style!) http://ow.ly/sGR1
  4. MORE LOST ZD HIP HOP AUDIO DEMOS: ZD's response to Pussycat Doll's "Buttons." HILARIOUS! Pre-city hall era. LOL! http://ow.ly/sGQf
  5. AUDIO DEMO: Zuma Dogg Political Activist Electronic Funky Song: "Vote You Down" http://ow.ly/sGP5
  6. Nothing I like more than waking up on the sidewalk than going to sleep on the sidewalk. I love being on the sidewalk at 12mid! Cold tonight.
  7. It's official: It's 12mid, start of a new day and a new week and I am starting it standing outside on the sidewalk. (Yes, wi-fi outside.)

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