Thursday, August 19, 2010

ZUMA DOGG'S Top 40 Tweets for 8/19/10 - News, Politics & Comedy (ALL-IN-ONE!)

[Pictured: Here are the first 40 things ZD thought of today. Trying his best to do "Tonight Show-style" monologue zingers in 140 characters, or less.]

New 3 day a week LA DWP sprinkling rules now goes into effect. Only allowed to water on days the libraries are open.
via HootSuite
  1. I'm sure some Hollywood big-shot paid for @Villaraigosa's VIP tic to Obama fundraiser, saying he presented Obama w U.S. Prez of Year Award.
  2. I wonder if @Villaraigosa discussed w Obama that L.A. is SO MUCH MORE FUCKED than most realize cause budget is fraud of a scam, over wine?
  3. I wonder if @Villaraigosa discussed fact that LA budget is based on money not here, yet and projections were WAY OFF w Obama over cocktails?
  4. I wonder if L.A. mayoral candidate @EricGarcetti discussed FBI investigation into his Bonnie Brae housing project with Obama over champagne?
  5. I wonder if L.A. Councilman Richard ALARcon had a security system installed in his "OTHER" home in CD2, ONLY THIS PAST MARCH? Probably not!
  6. I SMELL DAY OLD SUSHI: Councilman Richard alarCON JUST had alarm installed his "home" in March, EVEN AFTER history of squatter break-in?
  7. TONIGHT SHOW MONOLOGUE BASED ON STEVEN TYLER: You may have heard Steven Tyler has signed-on as the new judge on (cont) http://tl.gd/37viqr
  8. CAREFUL, STEVEN TYLER:If you fall off stage 1 MORE TIME, you'll be sitting in Simon's chair, but taking Paula's medications! (Could be FUN!)
  9. If you need to hire DJ for your next event, NO NEED! Just tell ZD when it is & what kind of event. I'll DJ it from home via blog music feed.
  10. When people refer to me as "genius-legend" now, it's gonna be for, "NO ONE can sleep more in between awake time than ZD. How does he do it?
  11. Huh...huh...huh...I WAS just about to go outside, but even though woke up at 11:30a, getting tired. Just gonna take nap, instead! Awe yeah!
  12. There is nothing more bitter, serious & negative than a comedian. (Unfortunately, seeing comedy takes seeing madness & wrong in EVERYTHING!)
  13. "Then the band stole the tempo and the music took ya down, Uh a-ooowe, uh, uh, a-a-ahh." - Greg Khin
  14. On what is FINALLY a REAL summer day in Venice, was about to FINALLY go outside, but "Rocky Mountain Way" came on. CAN'T LEAVE DURING THAT!
  15. @Villaraigosa, you KNOW you're laughing ass off at what ZD is saying about you and Cardenas and FOR ONCE, you're glad I'm saying something.
  16. COMPETING SHADY FACTIONS: At City Hall, there is no more of a tug-o-war battle over turf between mayor & ANYONE ELSE, other than CM Cardenas
  17. OH MY, DO NOT THINK Mayor V is along for any ride in Tony Cardenas' shady gravy train. Mayor will all but support/back candidate AGAINST TC.
  18. INSIDE CITY HALL SOURCES say the mayor would shed no crocodile tears if Cardenas went down. Will NEVER see mayor support TC in election.
  19. @garybryanshow Tyler on Idol a shark-jumpin' move? (YEAH, for HIM!)
  20. ZUMA MUSIC RADIO: Not here to change your life...merely enhance your day. http://ZumaShow.com.
  21. RT @JerryBrown2010: I'm craving my mom's banana cake: [Jerry knows what ZD knows, people vote based on who brought cookies and puppies!]
  22. Los Angeles City Councilman TONY CARDENAS is SO FUCKED Over The City Money He Gave His Sister's "Business" (AND SO A... http://ow.ly/18E1Qe
  23. Nutty blogger/talk hosts/clean sweepers would rather hoot & holler over a $3000 "GOTCHA" item, than the 3 BILLION DOLLAR DEBACLE TO NOWHERE.
  24. GUESS IT TAKES A WHILE TO MAKE IT DOWN NUTTY-DUMMY-ACTIVIST PIPELINE. The stuff I'm reading & hearing about these days is from 2-3 yrs ago.
  25. DEJA VU: I turn on the radio, I read the blogs -- and I remember EXACTLY where I was when I first noted the issue. (Usually 2 years prior.)
  26. I SEE THE PROBLEM WITH ACTIVISM, and it's ISN'T gonna change: YOU WON'T ACT UNTIL AFTER IT TOO LATE..NOT DURING DEVELOPMENT OF SHADINESS.
  27. I admit, "alternative investments" is much more complicated than blogging about selling a building cheap, or whatever. BIGGEST SCHEME IN LA!
  28. Activists still talking about small stuff. (IF NOT BILLIONS, IT'S SMALL!) Eventually, day will come "alternative investments" are discussed.
  29. If Douchearagosa says, "We really don't do a good job of operating parking garages, let's be honest." NOT AN EXCUSE! GET DEMING'S 14 POINTS!
  30. Imagine how bad off LA actually is since $50 mil for garage lease has been included in budget that it doesn't have yet. PROJECTIONS WAY OFF!
  31. CalPERS investment staff took luxury travel/gifts from financial firms (SO WHAT? It's been CLEARLY PROVEN activists DON'T CARE ABOUT THAT!)
  32. RT@villaraigosa: In person, the Sparks mascot is actually quite friendly http://twitpic.com/2g27fk (OFFICIAL BIZ ANTONIO, Mascot to Mascot?)
  33. L.A. CITY COUNCIL leases valuable parking lots to prevent 1000's of layoffs. (Always the LESSER of two stupidities!)
  34. Mummified remains of 2 babies wrapped in '30's newspapers found in L.A. apartment. ANYTHING, to prevent giving up rent controlled apartment!
  35. L.A. Must Lease 9 Parking Garages to Private Operators or Sack up to 1,000 Employees http://bit.ly/bzqmHA (Glad it comes down to THAT!)
  36. RT@LATimes: It's unanimous, president's visit leaves L.A. boiling http://lat.ms/bdBbJQ (Should have been his ELECTION that has 'em boiling!)
  37. HOW LONG does it take FEDERAL JUDGE to rule on ZD 1st Amendment suit vs LA City? Let's not make Federal case out of it! Oops, already did!
  38. Investigation Finds LAX Police Slacking On the Job, LAX Disagrees http://bit.ly/aerGUi (That's IMPOSSIBLE! No way city workers would slack!)
  39. Breaking news?: AP Source: Steven Tyler says he'll be an 'American Idol' judge:(Yeah, he's been SINGING like an A.I. contestant for YEARS!)

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