BAD MORNING & UNHAPPY THANKSGIVING: It's 4am. I am already trying to deal w problems. THIS IS A DISASTER. I NEED TO BE DEAD. BROKE & ALONE. Can't get to where I need to be. Gonna sink deeper and harder, today. Ain't much further to go. Eventually, I WILL be dead. Will take until the stench of death seeps into the hallway, before anyone would notice. NO ONE WOULD CARE. (Or I wouldn't be typing this, suffering, at 4am on Thanksgiving morning.) I HOPE IT'S MY LAST ONE. I WANNA BE DEAD, AS SOON AS GOD WILL ALLOW! TODAY WOULD BE PERFECT.
Happy Thanksgiving. Enjoy your meal. I don't have one. I'll be sitting alone and hungry because I am a bad person who deserves it.
Dear God, I'm BEGGING YOU! PLEASE TAKE ME TODAY, NOW! I DON'T HAVE A GUN TO KILL MYSELF, BUT NEED TO BE DEAD. PLEASE TAKE ME NOW! I'M READY!